Gemma Rose, eleven years old

Roie,
Eleven is silly, huge smiles, and bursts of laughter. It's the Mamma Mia soundtrack on the Alexa while you make up dances to every song with your siblings. But, eleven is also having big talks about the birds & the bees, and moon cycles, and internet safety. It's hating to see in real time how the world tries to tell you what is beautiful; how I already need to reassure you that strong is just as pretty as any other body type and calories on the label of that breakfast bar aren't important, and telling you that your natural smile is more beautiful than any fake head tilt/half tongue out pose that all the girls are doing in selfies these days. 

Eleven is sharing the same blanket and snacks on the couch with your head on my shoulder and it's also an eye roll across the dining room table when I ask if you've done your chores for the day. Eleven is teetering on the edge of my glittery-twirling-giggle-filled-little girl and my legs-up-to-your-chin-those-shorts-are-too-short almost-teenager. Gosh, it is so close to the cliff, I feel dizzy most days.  

At eleven, Roe, you've found your stride in school. You were on the honor roll all year (the first time in elementary school) as your learning development has finally caught up to your peers and you are confident using all the techniques and strategies you've learned from teachers and eye specialists and support staff over the last few years. You have grown so much, sweetheart; my heart soars to know that you feel proud and capable in your classes in a way you haven't yet up until this point. (I am so proud of you for never giving up!) 

You are the epitome of a role model student in terms of behavior and trust. You were responsible for getting multiple teachers mail, it was your second year on student council, and you are the bus 'mother' to many students. I know so many adults depend on you to guide and lead your peers. Grown ups are always stopping me to randomly say, "I'm so thankful my kid had Gemma to help them" on any given instance that I had no clue about because helping people is not something you even think to tell me about. You just do it second nature and move on with your day. Thank you, Gemmi, for always stepping up to that role.

Your room is always a mess - clothes thrown everywhere, trinkets piled high on dressers, and a bed that is never made. You are notorious for losing your sports jerseys (basketball and soccer this year!) and we have to scramble to find a replacement on the day of games?! But frequently, you get the overwhelming urge to deep clean and rearrange whole rooms; pushing furniture here and there until it is unrecognizable, loading up garbage bags with trash, and lighting candles and you call Dad and I in for a big reveal. 

You love cereal, yogurt parfaits, and salads. You are a great, adventurous eater - so although I don't like to share my shrimp, brussels sprouts, and cauliflower - I am grateful you let your taste buds fall in love with food that have been in the past reserved for the grown ups in the house. You are the kindest and most patient big sister. Olive and Red sometimes prefers you over me (especially when I'm trying to teach them independence) as you will hold, snuggle, and sneak them treats as much as they want. Rusty and Violet are your two little partners in fun- making up hilarious dances and elaborate pretend games. They will keep you little and I am endlessly grateful for that. You and Grey are so close in age that you mostly annoy the living crap out of each other (and your bickering annoys the rest of us!), but I also know that the two of you would defend each other to the ends of the Earth; in the way you ask about the other quietly to me and dad and how you both watch and cheer at each other's games. 

You have friends everywhere we go - classmates your age, teammates older than you, Violet and Rusty's friends younger than you, random kids at the fields that gravitate to you because you smile and wave to them with a this-is-obviously-a-babysitter kind of way. A friend/teacher said to us the other day, "Well, my son joined the rest of the entire fifth grade boys in being in love with Gemma, and I told him, 'you don't have a chance honey! She's like a 20 year old- she doesn't have time for you silly boys!" LOL...accurate though. 

Gem, I hope you always have kindness in your heart, and a friendly smile on your face, and no freaking clue that you look like you look! You are so cluelessly gorgeous it is almost laughable. Your style is comfy/sporty with sneakers on your feet. (To find a dress for you to wear to promotion was a feat of feats!) You like what you like and it's mostly tshirts, gym shorts, and some hair ties or woven bracelets around your wrist. You're taller than me now and sneak cardigans out of my closet and wear my crocs out that door even while I'm asking everyone if they've seen them so I can wear them. 

You are selfless to the point of martyrdom; always giving away your fancy pens, your last piece of gum, and the good seat to whoever looks like they need it - your friends, teammates, or siblings.  This makes for a great post in basketball, which you play fearlessly and tough; rebounding like a gosh darn queen. And also for an incredible defender on the soccer field, using your whole body as a shield and protecting our goal. You have the heart of a protector and care giver - so often teachers have said to me, "that girl has the heart of a future special ed teacher," because you have this patient, loving, and protecting heart that believes everyone deserves a fair shot. I am so proud and grateful for that, Roie - but I know you often times forget that YOU deserve all the things too. I will do everything I can to always make sure I am someone who defends and rebounds in life for your fair shot. 

When I sent your end of year photo to my best friends, Karpy said, "I want Gemma to be my BFF." and that really is your vibe. I love that you are the kind of a girl that everyone wants for a friend and every parent wants for a babysitter and every teacher wants for a student and every kid wants for a sibling. You are so likable, my darling. Not because of some gift from above (although probably a little bit of that) but mostly because of the way you make people feel when they are with you. Someone you want in your corner, someone you want to laugh with and share stories with, someone who is on your team (both metaphorically and literally), someone you want to stay up half the night watching rom-coms with and then waking up the next morning working side by side to clean up the mess of blankies and smashed popcorn kernels. 

Right now in time, I'm your momma and I have a boat load of lessons to get into your heart, and boundary lines to draw as you grow, learn, and mature. But my Gemmi Ro, I can't wait until you're grown up and we can just be friends. Because you are the actual nicest person I've ever known and I am so very grateful I get to be your momma.

Gemmi, 
I am so proud of you.
I am so inspired by you.
I am so very thankful for you.
Dad and I say daily - we couldn't get through a day without Gem.
That is actually true. 
I love you, my darling, 
forever -
even though you're already taller than me.
forever and ever,
xxox momma.