Keto: Month 2

Another month of Keto (our 2nd) and we are still going strong. We had intended to do intermittent fasting for the whole month, but we have discovered that most nights we don't get to eat dinner until well after 8p - so it's been hit or miss. We are still tracking our food using the Carb Manager app, but in the last part of the month, I was operating more on Lazy Keto because I have a better understanding of what and how much fits within my keto macro windows.

Truly, (I know this probably sounds like a huge lie if you haven't experienced the incredible feeling of freedom from dropping sugar and processed foods from your life --yet!), but the weightloss is just an added bonus to eating Keto for me. We began Keto because we wanted to lose some weight and I'll share these before & during pictures because, honestly, it's the easiest way to track what's happening to my body.

But it is so much more about the energy and the clear mind and the space for creativity and motivation. I don't feel clouded by all that tiredness and hunger. I can just be me and that is so liberating. The thought of putting all that garbage of sugars and carbs into my body on a consistent basis makes me so scared. I don't want to feel like that again (sluggish, constantly hungry).

We are coming to understand that it doesn't have to be an all or nothing lifestyle either though. We've had plenty of 'cheats' throughout the month but it was with the conscious and intentional decision that "I'm going to put this food into my body for fuel" instead of just mindlessly snacking and eating all the things that are happen to be in front of us. It is a purposeful choice that we are making each time we eat something because of how it makes our body feel afterwards. Sure, I'll have a piece of dessert to celebrate at a party, but I am also acknowledging what it is made of and how it will make me feel.

That idea alone is so drastically different than how I was eating before which was basically 'Eat all the things because they taste good', with no thought at all to how it would help (or hinder) the way my body feels.

Although there's not a ton of change between July and August - I feel like the inner joy and confidence sure shines out the most in the August picture. I am feeling stronger and more motivated, especially as I'm currently training for a half marathon in October. In the last part of July, I have put in 18 miles of training - and that's definitely 18 more miles on my own two feet than I would have without having the energy before keto (thank you Loni for peer pressuring me into registering for the race! hahha - positive peer pressure is the best kind!)

I track my goals in my planner monthly pages (one of my favorite self-reflection activities for the past two years!) and this month I wrote 12 blogposts (the most for any month this year) AND I wrote my first ever short story (!)...is that because I have more space in my brain for creativity and ideas?

The kids and I have visited many local spots this month (Jim Mayer trail, blueberry picking, Quemahoming dam, Ebensburg Pool, Library, Staple Bend Tunnel Trail0...is it because I have more energy to say Yes to adventures with them?

We had so much fun camping with the kids over the fourth of July, that B and I went and rented a campsite again before the end of summer -even though tent camping with four kids under 10 is a lot of work - it feels doable and -dare I say - fun now...is that because we have the energy to be ambitious and silly?

I don't know for sure if Keto and eating less sugar and processed food is in part to blame, but it definitely feels easier to be my full self and maybe that's because my body is getting the fuel it needed so desperately. 

In terms of weightloss (again, secondary), I didn't lose any (!) weight this month - still holding strong at 8lbs down total; yet my body continues to feel different and lots of people are giving me positive feedback/comments when I see them in person. (thank you!) It can feel pretty frustrating to not see the numbers going down on the scale, but I'm stay focused on the Non-Scale victories that are happening - like clothes feeling too loose, wearing my engagement ring again, wearing a bunch of summer dresses that haven't been worn in a realllly long time, wearing shorts again confidently.

I've also been doing photo comparisons any time I'm feeling discouraged about the scale number. If I start to get distracted by that number- I flip through my phone and find an old picture to side-by-side it to a current one and it gives me that immediate reminder that I'm going in the right direction - maybe not as fast as I would like (hahhaa, story of everyone's life) but at least it's one step forward at a time.

In February, my students did a Valentines day bulletin board and took pictures of couples, including teachers (hah). They snapped this first picture of me and B and as soon as I saw it I hated it -so so much. The person in the picture didn't look like me (the me I feel inside), I didn't recognize her as someone I know and care about. Ugh, I hated it (I still do). She is someone who was so tired and worn out and not taking care of herself. I would come home from school, famished - like a maniac reaching for anything to eat because I was star.ving.

Everything felt like a huge undertaking - I honestly remember thinking this exact line of thought, "I don't want to be so tired anymore, but how do I do that? I should start exercising, but I'm so tired. I should eat better, but I'm also so tired. If I ate better, exercise would be easier - but how do I even start when I'm so tired all the time." I had failed blood donation twice for low iron and even started taking iron pills to try to combat the exhaustion.

And now, I recognize the girl in the second picture. She looks like how my 'soul ball of Tabitha' feels. She is not controlled by food and eats real food that is good fuel for her body systems. She has more energy to play with the kids and get chores done and knocks things off her to do list like a champ - because everything is not so sluggish and exhausting and hunger-inducing. She donated blood again - no low iron - without any pills! She's still tired (mom of 4 over here!) but it's the end-of-a-fun-hard day tired that you fall into a bed and sleep soundly and when the morning comes, you're ready to get out and go for it again! It's not a tired that makes every single thing in the day feel like a chore.

I am most proud of that transformation. Of knowing and recognizing that I didn't like the way I was feeling and then I did something about it! Imagine that! hahaha, what a novel idea.

The girl in the second picture finds time to read and write and play and say yes! She has space in her brain to plan and daydream and brainstorm.  She's someone I LIKE spending time with - which is so comforting because I spend time with her 24 hours a day every single day of my whole life!! She is the only person who will be walking through this whole entire life with me, I want to take care of her; and I finally feel like I am starting to understand that.