parenthood exposed: highchairs

So I'm thinking about starting a new thread in my blog about the down and dirty, usually untold side of parenthood.  All the stuff that I've been surprised about on a regular basis.  I don't know how many times I've said, usually to myself or the dog, "Why didn't anyone warn me about this?"  For fair warning:  all of my phood exposed will appear very random in topic but usually it comes about because something recently happened to me...which is always very random in motherhood.

Parenthood Exposed:  Highchairs

It is a blast searching for baby equipment while you're pregnant.  Let me rephrase that, its addicting looking for baby equipment while you're pregnant.  Baby stores do this incredible marketing ploy that brainwashes you into thinking you need to have coordinating accessories for baby in the nursery, in the kitchen, even in the car!  Everything matches with weird, little, smiling, cartoon forest animals.  So before baby arrives, you set everything up like a wild woman (even though your baby isn't going to use that high chair for at least 4 months) and blame it on the dog getting "used" to the baby stuff being around - when really you just want to stare at all the cute crap you bought. 

Fast forward to 10 months later and your perfect, bouncing child is now shoving food between the high chair cushion and the actual high chair. 

"Sure sweetheart, yea, just wipe it on the seat.  Awesome"

And to get the high chair cushion off - you need to unthread the safety buckles (5 of them), unhook these crazy little rubber band things that slip through the tiniest slat and hook around the back (4 of them) and unhook the plastic hooks from the side.  This should be done as often as it needs cleaned or if you're me - once a week...and sometimes thats a stretch.  So, the cushion obviously needs washed because there are blueberry stains and matted pieces of cheese and bananas all over it.  gross.  Then when you get the cushion off, you discover that there is a whole army of food that has been hiding UNDER it that apparently has been there for as long as you've last removed the cushion. 

ewwww.

"come & get it, Bullet!"

why didn't anyone warn me that high chairs are insanely hard to keep clean?