Leaving our baby

Half of our heart is singing,  WE ARE GOING TO THAILAND!!!
and the other half is whispering in sadness, we are leaving booboo for 2 weeks.

Since folks have heard of our upcoming trip we have received some variation of the following:
So exciting!!  Are you taking the Babe?

Which when translated usually means:
Holy Crap, that is awesome!  If you're taking the baby - I think you are insane.  If you're not taking the baby - I think you might be a negligent parent.

Either way you slice it - we look like crazy parents...taking your 11 month old to Thailand is insanity.  How would we pack for that?  How would we keep a baby entertained on a 13 hour flight?  (yea, I said 13 hours...how are we going to keep ourselves entertained?!)  But, leave your 11 month old while you vacation in Thailand is also insanity.  How are we going to justify probably missing his first steps (he's so close!!)?  How are we going to enjoy ourselves while missing his kisses and sweet face so much?

We would love to take him...but he's just not big enough.  Sure, we could do it - but probably wouldn't be fun for any of us.  We got a stamp in our then 6 month old child's passport before his 25 year old godfather even owned a passport...but we had four grandparents traveling with us too...which made the trip much easier.

And really if HE had to make the choice:
Option A:  fly on a plane for 13 hours with mum and dad and sleep without your crib and sound machine and be in super hot weather
OR
Option B:  hang with grams & paps and be smothered in hugs and kisses, eat m&m's to your hearts content and have constant attention...

pretty sure he'd hands down pick option B.  So we've discussed that when our kids don't drink formula and are out of diapers...they'll get to travel with us...but for now - he's being shipped to the grandparents (who have already purchased every item on the suggested shopping list that I sent them.  spoiled.)

Are we afraid?  YES
we are afraid grey will miss us and cry the whole two weeks, God forbid, but we are afraid that making our last will and testament is not just a precaution, we are afraid that grey won't be able to sleep, we're afraid that he will need to go to the hospital for being sick or injured, we're afraid he will take his first steps without us being there, we're afraid he'll look like a grown ass man when we get back, we're afraid he'll get off his schedule and be unhappy, we're afraid we won't be able to get back to him for some reason, we're afraid he won't remember us

But even though we are afraid of all of those (and so many more) things...we want Greyson to learn (even if he's only 11 months old) that you should follow your dreams...even when you are afraid.  There is such a big world and so many things to see and do...but you'll never see it if you are too afraid.  We realize that the most influential role models our son will have is us.  And if we're trying to tell him to go out and do things, but we're never leaving his side because we're afraid to leave him...he'll never get it.

And its not just about a lesson for Greyson, because we will miss him every single moment - but we are still us in here. Despite the 11 month adjustment we have made in our life - our roles as Mom and Dad will not swallow us whole.  We know will be better at Mom and Dad if we don't forget that we were first Wife and Husband and even before that Tab and Brandon.

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