Gigi

Marianne first got to know me when I was 15 years old, as her only son's girlfriend. So at first, she tolerated me. After some time, when it was clear I wasn’t going anywhere; she liked me, I think she found some comfort in a shared girlhood after years of boys; growing up with 3 brothers, having a son, all his teammates and friends wrecking her house with basketballs and swimming pool footprints. But with me, she could just be a girl;  so we got pedicures on the first day of fishing, and we went to NYC for hair appointments and ate bagels in Central Park. She came to love me and proudly called me her daughter-in-love (she said daughter-in-law felt too distant for how close we were). I was a daughter, a sister, and a friend all in one and the way she trusted me let me know that she loved me. 

2000

2021

She did trust me. This became clear when I was able to convince her to get on an airplane after years of refusing so that we could visit the Caribbean. She loved that trip so much that she continued to go back again and again finding peace laying on a beach chair under a thatched roof canopy breathing in that fresh ocean breeze.

She trusted me with her grandbabies. She was delighted and honored to be called Gigi. Her grandkids were the pinnacle of her pride and she watched them grow with wonder and awe. Her own mom passed away before she had her child, so becoming a grandmother herself was such a privilege to her. She was immeasurably happy when we told her she would be a grandma for the first time. And then we told her five more times and each time she was overjoyed and said, "I guess we will need a bigger table." Each grandchild was perfect to her and cherished in their own tiny ways by her. Each of my children have had the chance to grow up with a blanket of unconditional, infinite love and unquestioned pride wrapped around them from their Gigi. They had a secure understanding that they were perfect to her exactly as they showed up everyday and they will ultimately be better people because they lived within their Gigi’s love.

Greyson

Gemma

Violet

Rusty

Redland

Olive

She trusted me with her son. There are no words to say thank you to the person who raised the greatest gift of my life; my favorite person and the very best dad to all my babies. The way she has always looked at him and loved him; he did not go a day in his life without knowing with absolute certainty that he was everything that mattered to her. She raised the most decent and good man. We received a condolence card this week that said, “We are so very sorry for the loss of your mother. Although we never knew her, we know she was amazing because of the man of character you are!” If you knew her or only even knew of her - then you knew one thing for sure; she has a son named Brandon who was the light of her life. 

She trusted me with everyone she held dear. Her family, her friends, her pups. She made me a part of her life. A life that so many people could see was filled with laughter and joy and silliness. She had her trials and tribulations; her challenges - that is no secret. It was not an easy road many times in Marianne’s life. But she walked it with grace and humor and so you saw her and wanted to be close to that kind of spirit. So many people in her life felt close to her because that’s what she did; she made you feel valuable and seen. 

But everyone also knew, you could be close to Marianne, but there was everyone else and then there was Rudy. High school sweethearts and 44 years married and true best friends. There is barely a space between their names for anyone who speaks of them: MarianneandRudy, ButchandMare, PappyandGigi. I can’t and won’t speak to the depths of love, patience, and kindness that the two of them existed within. Their shared world was truly unreachable by anyone else; it’s the stuff of stories. You lived out the vows in the truest version. So rare is it in our world to have that kind of love. It has been an honor to stand so near to it.

May we all find in her absence, an inspiration to trust, to be joyful, and to make others feel valued and seen. May we love each other through this loss. It’s how Mare faced every hard thing. What a blessing she was to this world, and how lucky we were to be the ones she held dear.

Memory eternal, Gigi.
We will be loving your forever.