A day in the life - July 2019

A photo every hour from Monday, July 8, 2019. Just a day in my life that was extraordinarily ordinary. Some days are better, some days are harder - but most days are about like this; little moments of wonderful, lots of moments that require patience, and many tiny regular moments that all together make up my life right now.

around 5:45am, after making Brandon's lunch for work and kissing him goodbye. I get to sit down at the dining room table and plan, brainstorm, and track in my planner. I started tracking on my monthly calendar pages various goals that I have for myself (like water intake, outdoor hours, step count, etc) about a year ago and I have loved being able to hold myself accountable each day and month; it is motivating and inspiring to me. I blogged, checked email, and added things to an online cart for camping items I am fantasizing about (not buying, just adding and thinking about them, hah).

Around 6:40a, I went down to let the chickens out of the coop who had been clucking and crowing at me. I refilled their feeder and carried up their water container because it is empty after a few days. Every morning as I'm walking to the coop, I say to them, "Good morning, girls!" They love being free range and I love looking out the windows all day and seeing them waddle about the yard.

Around 7:30a, Grey was up first this morning, and uncharacteristically early because after our long weekend I made everyone go to bed last night at a decent time. I was just finishing up my blog post and I showed him what we were doing this time last year and the years before that. He knows I "write a blog" but he still doesn't get what that means. Someday I hope he and his sibs float back here and are grateful to find their mother's words and perspective from when they were growing up. 

Around 8:50a, as I am recovering from the past holiday and weekend of not tracking macros on Keto and I find that I am pretty hungry. There will be no intermittent fasting today! (hah). I made an egg, ham, and muenster sandwich on a Keto bagel with a little bit of mayo. The kids have already eaten pb&j toast, so while I eat, I start on the last chapter of my Book Love Foundation summer club book for this week - We Got This by Cornelius Minor.

Around 9:45a, I have the kids do some chores because the house is a wreck from all the camping this weekend - sheesh! the laundry! Three kids split the dishwasher (Rust gets silverware duty) and Grey chose cleaning the downstairs bathroom over the dishwasher. I still have to hand wash the roaster pan from the family reunion, the thermos from camping, and the crockpot from last night's beef roast.  

Around 10:30a, I go collect the chicken eggs because the girls need a little time in the morning to get their egg laying done. We hadn't collected over the weekend while at camp, so we had 15 eggs that I carried up in my shirt. We keep our eggs out at room temperature until we have about 2-3 dozen of eggs to wash. Once they are washed, then they go in the fridge.

 Around 11:35a, we make it to the Jim Mayer Trail for a walk with the dogs. I was feeling really guilty about the pups being stuck in the house all weekend while we camped - so my guilt motivated the ambition to take both dogs (nearly 100 lbs each) and all four kids to the trail by myself. It was an overcast day, so my fingers were crossed that it wouldn't be crowded (Bullet does not do well with strangers) and my wishing paid off - we only saw a handful of people biking/walking! The kids walked, picked up millipedes, made walking sticks, and splashed in a few run offs along the trail.  Bullet even got to swim in the river which made him the happiest boy ever. Good job, guilty brain!

Around 12:50p, we made it back to Sheila after our walk and everyone was ready for a snack. One of the most important things I've learned in my nine years of motherhood is that any event or activity will fall all the way to hell if you do not have snacks. Literally, it is the key component to success: must have snacks. The kids had veggies straws, chocolate chip cookies, and juice bags.

Around 1:20p, it's time for real food and the kids had lunchmeat sandwiches and yogurt at the kitchen table. They were being really silly and giggly and it was kind of making me nuts actually because Rusty is making messes and they are laughing about it. I ate a cheese stick, salt & vinegar Blue Diamond almonds, and half of a 85% chocolate mini bar - also drank a big bottle and half of water.

Around 2:45p, time to use the leftover coffee in the pot for afternoon iced coffee (I love this daily tradition so much). I had a ton of laundry to continue to switch in the washer/dryer and/or fold. The big kids were watching Hunter Street downstairs on tv and the little kids were cutting up craft paper in the girls' room and drawing.

Around 3:45p, I made the kids get into the garden with me to do some (much needed!) weeding. Everyone got a plant (or a row) that they are responsible to weed before they can be done. It was sunny but not too hot, just muggy. We have tomatoes, brussel sprouts, and zucchini growing...and maybe a few bean plants survived (?) B was home by now and headed down to the garage to change the oil in both vehicles and the tractor. 

Around 4:40p, I tried to teach Rust (again) to use the peddles on his bike. It is frustrating for both of us. He can do the rotation about twice before jarring back on the brakes. I want to have more patience but I'm bent in half moving his feet around singing "around and around and around we go!" like a psychopath.

Around 5:50p, the kids were jumping on the trampoline and I got to finish We Got This. B had come up to see if I will come down and hang out in the garage while he changes the oil...I do sit for a few minutes with him while he's under the truck with oil all over his arms and hands, but I start thinking about the laundry that I could be doing, and the dinner that needs made, and then Rustman needs a drink anyway, so - love you, babe, but bye.

Around 6:30p, I put in dinner for the kids which consists of all the leftovers from this weekend's family reunion. I put the mac&cheese into muffin bites in hopes that it would inspire them to eat more because we have a huge tupperware still left over (update: it didn't inspire them). And we have left over chicken nuggets that I put into wraps for them with shredded cheese and Ranch. 

Around 7:45p, the kids were driving me bonkers. It's too much silliness and then I found an empty juice bag in the couch cushions and I start yelling. Literal garbage is laying in our house and they keep walking by it!?!?! It's becomes a whole thing. I send Gemma to her room for giggling too much (most amazing mom ever) and give Grey a whole lecture on how if he wants to be treated like a big kid, he needs to act like one. Rust has to take the juice bag to the garbage because I know it was him (lol!) and Violet gets reminded that she needs to stop whining because she ain't no baby child - you are almost five! Ugh, I get to the end of all of my mom lectures before I realize I'm probably an insane person and I tell them they are not allowed to watch tv until they put together a 100 piece puzzle of Chewbaca.

Around 8:45p, after helping the kids finish the puzzle, B and I sat down to dinner while the kids watch more Hunter Street. We had baked garlic & Parmesan salmon with asparagus and it was amazing. The Smirnoff sparkling seltzer helped too. hah. We got to talk about our days, and work, and what's coming up in the week, and I got him updated with all the new possible camping supplies I added to the online cart today.

Around 9:30p, after putting Violet to bed, I found Rustman asleep snuggled up to Gem on the couch. She and Grey are "sleeping downstairs tonight!" and I carried Rusty upstairs to his own bed and then I laid down next to Gem on the couch for a little and then sat next to Grey and try to understand this weird show and asked questions to which he answered, "Mum, it's like kind of hard to explain this is like the third season and you missed too much." B finally came in from his oil change marathon.

Around 10:45p, after turning on the dishwasher, and switching the last laundry load, and washing my face and moisturizer, and kissing everyone goodnight - I snuck to our bed to read some of Miles Morales Spiderman by Jason Reynolds before B came to bed. Truthfully, I made it one paragraph until my head bobbed and I hit my face off the page.

Not very fancy, but it's exactly right parts boring, wonderful, challenging, and simple that make this one precious life extraordinary.

Keto: Month 1

So...we are doing Keto. Hah. That's so annoying and I hate being all like, "oh, sorry, can't eat that - we are eating Keto." but this where we've come and this is who we are. hah.

Brandon and I started eating Keto on June 1 and we committed to try it for a month, just to try to reset our eating and food choices. This is not a new thing, we do weird stuff for short periods of time because we're weird and we like challenges.

Prep:  So we set a one month goal of Keto and went for it. I did most of the research - reading up on blogs, following Keto instagram accounts, watching youtube videos, and pinteresting recipes. But it was so helpful to have B totally supportive and doing it with me. We use the app Carb Manager to track our food (it's free!) and it keeps track of all of our macros which I think is the biggest reason we didn't get the "keto flu." We were really serious about sticking to the Keto macros of 70% fat, 25% protein, and 5% net carbs from our caloric intake each day. We also drink tons of water - at least 48-56oz a day which I think helped us.

Initial thoughts: The first two days were strange - we were pretty hangry and our brains felt a little off (kind of like buzzed from alcohol) and then by the end of day three we started to feel good - great even. It helped too that I had already bought food that was Keto approved and we had it on hand. These foods really came in handy those first 2-3 days when our body was trying to adjust: avocado, cheese sticks, eggs, lunchmeat & cheese, and almonds.

Trying new things: Once we were in Ketosis, we started to expand our menu options. I learned about fat bombs and now we always have a batch in the freezer (great for the end of the day when you need a little boost for your macros - or the perfect mid-afternoon energy boost). We made Keto bagels, tried Bulletproof coffee and La Croix/Bubly. Brandon became a master at making zoodles (zucchini noodles), we fell in love with cauliflower rice, and we made tortillas out of fried cheese (mind blown forever).

What I missed: the only thing I was missing during the month was being able to just eat something that was already there. And this is coming from a huge bread and chocolate lover! (I still eat chocolate, just 85% dark chocolate). It is pretty annoying to have to actually MAKE something to eat; you can't just eat whatever is sitting there already. But I don't miss bread, I don't miss fruits (!), I don't miss potato chips - nothing. I just miss not having to do work for food (hahhahha).

The truth: Towards the end of the month, I started feeling a little anxious about going back to eating "normal" again. This month of Keto has literally felt liberating. I cannot begin to explain how much of a prisoner I felt like to food before this. I know that sounds really extreme, but truthfully I felt so hungry all.the.time. I could not get satisfied; I would eat breakfast and then a half hour later I would find myself needing a snack. My portion sizes were out of control because I constantly felt famished and then I was speaking terribly to myself in my mind - but I was so hungry! On top of the hungry I was so sluggish. I didn't have energy or motivation to do much of anything - certainly not exercise, but even tackle a big chore/task. I really didn't feel like that sparkling ball of Tab in my soul; I was so tired and so hungry and so hatefully unmotivated. How long had I been feeling like that? 10 years? my whole adult life?!

And on Keto, I am satisfied. I don't know - I cannot explain this and I am no nutritionist or doctor at all. But I don't have that hungry-sluggish feeling AT ALL. It is nothing now to have a coffee in the morning and feel great until noon when I have a proper brunch. And it tastes so good and I can feel the energy rising up in my body and then I'm good to go until a late afternoon snack. It is honest to goodness freedom. I feel awake and energized and satisfied. Any weight that has been lost is NOTHING in comparison to the freedom of not being hungry and tired all the time. It's the reason I am still doing it now, I don't want to feel like that again. The taste of carbs could not offset that crummy, bloated, exhaustion state.

So what happened? In customary male vs female weight loss; B lost about double the weight that I did. He lost a total of 15 lbs in the month and I lost 8 lbs. Despite the minimal weight loss that I had, I definitely like the person that is in my mirror reflection better now. I also had a lot of non-scale victories in this month; I fit into summer pants that I couldn't when I bought them last year, and I purchased the pair of shorts that came in my Stitch Fix and wore them!!! (big deal bc I haven't worn shorts in public for about 10 years). We didn't do any actual measurements of our body but I did take pictures the first of the months and you can see small changes.

If I'm being honest, it was about the weight at the start of this. I didn't like the girl that was looking back at me in the mirror and knew I needed a change. But now after getting this feeling of freedom from food, the weight just feels like a bonus to actually feeling better. Like my real self can shine through because the fog of hunger and exhaustion isn't blocking the way all the time. I'm still tired at the end of the day and fall into bed with desperate relief - hello, mother of four - but it's a tired that comes from getting stuff done all day and spending time with the kids playing and exploring; actually participating in life!!

Again, I AM NOT A NUTRITIONIST, I'm not even close to an expert on Keto, but this has worked so far for me. I still have a long way to go; I daydream about the day that my 1month 'after' photos will be my 'before' photos - but it takes baby steps...small good choices each day; each meal! As much as the weight coming off feels good - the being awake and energized is more valuable to me; as a mum, wife, and me as my own person. I want to feel like I have the energy and stamina to participate in this one, great, beautiful life. And Keto has helped me.

Around Here Week 27: 06/30-07/06

a glimpse into what it is like to live in our home just this moment.

Intentional Outdoor Hours: 337+ hours (of 1000)
Up 53 hours this week which I can feel in my soul too because outside in the wide open space with the fresh air does something good for my well being - honestly. I'm up so many hours in large part because we went camping this weekend, so even my sleeping went into outdoor time if I'm snoozing in a tent; especially when it's a two man tent and we have two adults and two kids puzzle pieced in it - ya feel me. hah. It was a totally hectic week but much of it was outside and that made all the difference to being able to not only manage it but ENJOY it!

Reading We Got This by Cornelious Minor with the Book Love Foundation Summer club and starting Miles Morales Spiderman by Jason Reynolds.

Experiencing a wildlife encounter. On our dog walk in the morning around the cornfield, everything was going normal when both dogs and I stopped dead in our tracks at a sound I had never before in my life heard. My brain started doing the 'ole Rolodex spinning trying to look for prior knowledge at what this sound could possibly be. It landed on feral child (?!) or injured cow (?!). After the first growl that stunned us, the dogs started sniffing and pulling on the leashes and I was worried that whatever was in the weeds was going to come out and want to fight the pups. Luckily, after three warning growls, I heard it retreat deeper into the woods. We got back to the house and I searched 'warning growl of a bobcat' and yep, that's what it was exactly. I think maybe it's a momma with some babies, because the message was very clear, "get away from here." So, we are steering clear of the cornfield for a few weeks to give her some space.

Swimming. alot. At Gigi & Pappy's pool, at Sleeks pool, at fishing camp for an afternoon, at the Quemahoming dam while camping. These kids are fish and I am feeling pretty guilty about counting a swim as a bath because honestly, they might be getting one legit bath/shower a week right now. #momgoals, I know. Violet has been doing great and we are still operating under a very strict floaties on in the deep end rule. Rust has even been trying out his swimming sans floaties as long as a grown up is in the water with him. He is a maniac and wants to swim underwater constantly; he just needs to get better at longer breath holding and he will be on his way!

Teaching Violet to ride a bike without training wheels. I literally gave her one push and she can balance perfectly, as long as she's going straight. We still have some work to do on steering/turning, but she has been the easiest kid so far!

Switching out all the girls clothes and sizes and I'm done! both boys and girls clothes are all sorted and cleared out of the attic - yay for me! I have been delivering totes and bags to friends and family who are in line for handmedowns from the Studer kids and it makes me feel like the most accomplished girl in the world.

Celebrating July 4th with family. We enjoyed Clam Casino and other delicious treats at Uch and Kevin's house on Independence Day eve. She made buffalo baked cauliflower, artichoke dip with veggies, and bacon skewers for us Keto guests like the most thoughtful girl that she is (all delicious!) We sang Happy Birthday to USA with sparklers in our breakfast on the 4th and then headed to Kuma & Buck's house for dinner of grill food and swimming that night with cousins. No one loves sparklers more than Rust Man and all four kids are obsessed with the tiny gunpowder poppers. #Lawdhelpme

Camping out at the Quemahoming with our cousins. We headed out midday to set up our site with our limited camping supplies. In case you don't know, I hate camping. hah. It's the bugs and the dampness and the not-having-the-things-I-need-where-they-should-be that makes camping not my favorite. But, the kids, man; always getting me to do stuff I don't love and then ending up not hating it. #thatmomlife We took our two handmedown two-man tents (thank you Aunt Dar!), kayaks, and then figured it out. Between the rain, and the back and forth between our other commitments (baseball, family reunion) - you'd think it wasn't a great time, but you'd be wrong! It was all the outdoor, fresh air, cousin laughing, swimming, kayaking, fire smell on all our clothes, muddy feet therapy that we all didn't know we needed.

Enjoying time with family at our Uzelac family reunion (the 51st!) We spent the day at Solomon Run Fire hall with our Uzelac family (my mom's mom's side). My grandma was one of 14, so we have a big family and seeing the reunion through my own kids' eyes has brought such renewed appreciation for getting together with extended family. It was a beautiful and meaningful day and I'm always grateful to be there to represent my gram's legacy. (miss you everyday, Gram).

Summer sporting with Roxbury volleyball (3 wins, 3 losses this week) and all-star sanction Little League games. Grey had practices earlier in the week and then a game on Friday night in which they lost against Hollidaysburg, which then sent them out to Huntingdon (1.5hrs away) for another game on Saturday. They lost again which kicked them out of the Little League tourney (bummer) but we have lots of all-star LOCAL (praise!) baseball tournaments coming in the next few weeks yet. In other baseball mom news, I spent 5 more hours in the concession stand this week between the CT tournament and the 12U Sanction team game.

Making taco meat (concession stand), buffalo chicken dip (Uch's party), chocolate chip cookies and snack necklaces (camp), a roaster of chicken nuggets and Mac&Cheese and a batch of chocolate chip walnut cookies and more snack necklaces (fam reunion) Brandon and I celebrated a whole month of Keto with pizza for dinner on Sunday night and it was....just meh. I mean, the cheese, banana peppers, and ham were delicious - but I can eat all that on Keto anyway, so the crust wasn't really doing all much for me (!!?!!?!)

Keto'ing and trying chia seeds on my yogurt (yum) and making keto mug bread for the first time (thanks for the rec Kitty!) Brandon made incredibly delicious baked tilapia with homemade 'salsa' of peppers, cucumbers, and avocado on top with a side of buttery brussel sprouts; I could have died and gone to heaven. He also made some delightful Zaluski (Zuchinni noodle haluski - hah!) I made a batch of Keto bagels and some more peanut butter fat bombs again. We tried egg loaf (aka keto french toast) for breakfast, but I wasn't crazy about it - Violet ate several pieces though, hah! We meant to try intermittent fasting this week, but with late volleyball and baseball games - we didn't eat dinner until after 8p each night! We tried Blue Diamond's Salt & Vinegar almonds and I kid you not, new favorite snack EVER (2 net carbs). We also had Smirnoff's Sparkling Seltzer at camp and they were great (1 net carb)Big Non-Scale Victory this week: when I couldn't find my shirt for Grey's baseball team, I just put his regular season jersey on instead and it fit! He almost fell over laughing about how I fit in his shirt (I don't know if he was more impressed with me or impressed that he's getting big enough that I can steal his clothes).