Grandmas & Kids to NYC 4th annual trip

We usually make our annual Grandmas & Kids trek to NYC in the fall, but had to bump it up this year since our third little studerbaby is due in September and I'm figuring tri-state visits will be out of the question between newborn tending and basketball season.  

I plan our adventures using Tripit and this year decided that at the ages that the kids are, it would be both fun and possible to visit Coney Island, the High Line, and make a stop at Knoebels on the way home.  It was such a great trip this year - the best yet? - and I am continually grateful that I have this weekend to share the city with my country-raised kids and that is solely due to the fact that I have a Mum and Mom-in-law willing to make the trip with us each year.  I could not do it without their support and help!  (thank you!!)

We drove out this year again (second year now after two years of 7hr one way train rides the first two years!) and we try to leave by 6am to keep the kids snoozing for most of the ride.  We make a stop around Reading, PA for some breakfast and then get back on the road to head to our New Jersey hotel.

The most important thing about our hotel for the kids is that it has a pool, and our stay at the DoubleTree Hilton Hotel Nework Airport delivered on the pool requirements.  We checked in and freshened up a bit from our 5hour drive.  The grandmas are great for packing snacks and hotel treats on our trips.  Our room is fully stocked with snack bags, fruit, water, and granola bars for the weekend.  It really helps save on vending machine snacks (my kids get hungry approximately every 3 and a half minutes) and also are easy to transport in the diaper bag when we head out on our adventures.

From the hotel, we took the shuttle to Newark airport where we hopped on the Coach USA bus to Port Authority NYC for $28 (round trip adult and kids ride free).  Where we then got on subway to make the very long trip out to Coney Island in Brooklyn for the afternoon.  It was a long day of traveling with three kinds of transportation:  car, bus, subway; but the kids did great (and grandmas did too!)

After the very long subway ride all the way to the end of the line and an extreme meltdown from Gemma (she didn't want to neither walk nor ride in the stroller), we finally made it to the New York Aquarium in Coney Island.  The aquarium is still undergoing some renovations from the devastation of Hurricane Sandy, but the kids loved the exhibits and we all enjoyed dancing and cheering at the sea lion show.  Since we visited on a Friday afternoon after 4pm, the entry fee is a donation of your choice, we made the visit extremely affordable.

Afterwards, we headed out to the boardwalk and the kids went bonkers over the sand and water.  I was startled by how clean and beautiful Coney Island looked, which I'm assuming is because of all the clean-up and reno that needed to happen after the storms last year.  Last time I was in Coney Island it was sort of dirty and littered - not somewhere I'd think someone could lounge peacefully near the ocean.  But when we arrived it was lovely, clean, and not very crowded at all. 

 

The kids ran up and down the beach chasing seagulls and even stood knee dip in the water joyfully giggling.  

We had dinner on the boardwalk at Nathan's to pay homage to the famous Coney Island hot dog (although our own Johnstown Coney Island hot dogs beat Nathan's dogs; no contest.)  The kids had a blast on the kiddie rides at Luna Park.  After another visit to the ocean, we hopped back on the subway for a long return to Port Authority to catch our USA Coach bus ride back to Newark to quickly fall fast asleep in our hotel.

On Saturday, we headed back into the city for our favorite brunch of NY bagels and cream cheese.  Then we walked the High Line from the most northern point at West 30th Street and 10th Avenue down to Chelsea Waterside Park at West 23rd Street.  The High Line was pretty but it was a really hot day and we were so grateful to get to the water playground to cool off.  The kids had a blast splashing, digging in the sand, and transporting bottles of water to and fro. 

We stopped at the Chelsea Waterside Dog Park before taking a short walk (with another playground and ice cream break along the way) to Chelsea Market to window shop and get back onto the High Line.  Walking back north on the High Line was more pleasant than the morning because it had cooled off significantly and the sun had started to set.  We loved the High Line water feature at 15th Street!  By the time we had trekked back up to the 30th street exit, the kids were zonked out in the stroller.  

But have no fear!  The kids were back up for our room service pizza party at the hotel followed by a visit to the indoor pool (it was freezing though!) My mom got in and swam with our fish-baby Gemma while Gigi hopped in and out and came to sit by me with towel blankets on the sidelines.  (Way to take one for the team, Abba!)

On Sunday we said farewell to Jersey and headed East toward home, but made an stop along the way at Knoebel's Amusement Resort to tire the kids out a little and to break up the long car ride.  Knoebel's was amazing and comes with a high recommendation from the Studers.  Parking and entrance into the park is free (!!) and we bought $40 worth of tickets for the kids to have more than enough fun on the kiddie rides.  They rode and played to their full hearts content that afternoon and it was a wonderful way to break up the long ride home from the city.  

The grandmas even rode a 'spooky house' ride with each kid which - as suspected - did not go over well with two little scaredycats.  But it was them that had insisted and we all had a good laugh about the 'spooky guys' and Gem still talks about the spooky house and that she 'don't want to do it' again.  

It was really such a great weekend and maybe the best Grandmas & Kids trip to NYC yet!  Thank you to Abba and Gigi who go along with my scheduled weekend of city exploring and stroller-pushing.  I would not be able to do this trip alone.  We are so lucky to be able to do this all together and I am so grateful that the kids get to experience a little piece of their city-loving mumma every year.

Keeping it real, yo.

since we've arrived home from a wonderful vacation this past Sunday, it has been one hurdle after another over here with appliances and machinery in our life.  Ya know those weeks?  When one thing breaks, they all seem to go?  It's be like that here.

First, after driving home with the kids in the truck from the pet store with some new fish tank rocks as our tank desperately needs cleaned; we made it all the way back to our road and the truck started acting funny.  It seemed like the gas wasn't working then the battery and engine lights came on and then that's it.  It was just done.  Thankfully for kind neighbors, the kids and I hitched a ride up the rest of the road and our quarter-mile driveway home while the truck sat vacant and depressed in a neighbor's driveway.

On Tuesday, we were able to at least get it up to our house and had a cousin take a look at only to discover we needed to fix our cigarette lighter fuse to run the diagnostic test on it.  After messing with it all evening, B forgot to take the key out of the ignition overnight and killed the battery.  So then we needed to get the battery charger from my dad-in-law and after an overnight charge; it fired up this morning as we were going to run it out to the shop to get fixed this morning.  That is until we put it in reverse and it shut down and wouldn't start up again.  So...yea, it's still sitting in the driveway d.e.a.d.

trying to jump the truck yesterday for a half hour with zero success.

but that's not all folks, oh no, that's not all.
Also, our cable box needs replaced; for unknown reasons over vacation it has lost the ability to use the Guide and On-Demand functions.
Our Central Air is out and after turning it on before leaving for our volleyball game this week, we came home to a 90+ degree house as the heat kicked on instead.
Our tractor isn't working right and the dandelions in our yard our knee-high by the fourth of July.
and,
B accidentally broke the garage door this week.

the moral of this story is to steer clear of us for a few days as we are having a very negative effect on machinery this week.
Also, does this mean Transformers are real and they don't like us?

So, yesterday, 27 weeks pregnant and nearly 90 degrees in our house with no vehicle to go to a pool, we watched a lot of tv and sat stationary for a long time.  I had this brilliant idea to set up an indoor tent for the kids and play camping with them.  Since we hadn't gone for groceries yet after coming home from vacation (!!) we were down to hot dogs and popcorn for lunch!  Moments later, popcorn was spilled and crunched into the living room floor and the kids decided they didn't like hot dogs that day.  So, yea.  it was time for quiet time.

And instead of cleaning up the popcorn, organizing the huge pile of toys the kids 'cleaned up' by putting them on top of the bench, or actually doing anything productive at all; I sat chugging water in front of an SVU marathon for an hour and a half.  Whatevs, man.  Just keeping it real.

And if I'm being totally honest, all this stuff is pretty freaking annoying and inconvenient, but it's not that big of a deal.  Vacation last week recharged my batteries, my mom surprised me yesterday by stopping by with chocolate and a foot scrub, we had dinner and the kids swam at Gigi&Pappy's last night, tomorrow is my favorite holiday of the year, and we have healthy, mostly happy kids.  I mean, what is there really to complain about?

I think weeks like this are put in place as a chance to take stock of the things you depend on (sometimes unnecessarily so, hello cable box), remind you to slow down and pay attention (hello, accidentally killing the truck battery), and mostly as a prime example that sometimes you just need to not be so hard on yourself and go with it.  The only way to dig out of these problems is by slowly enlisting help and getting them fixed one by one.  It just is what it is and being frustrated about it is a waste of energy.

Now excuse me while I welcome the AC guy to our house and ensure him that our wildly barking dogs are indeed upstairs and apologize repeatedly while Greyson asks him 3600 questions about what he's doing.  Meanwhile, I need to monitor Gemma while she uses an excessive amount of cleaning spray to 'clean' random surfaces all over the house.

It is far from rainbows and unicorns (far, FAR from it), but it's our chaotic, happy mess of a life.  And it suits us just fine, even when it's annoying like this week.

The Mom Next Door Series: Melodye O.

I know our Mom Next Door this week; Melodye, in both real life and even closer in the blogosphere where we enjoy reading each other's ramblings and updates on living a creative life, parenting, and gratitude.  Melodye is someone I admire both from a parenting perspective and creatively.  She is constantly attempting new projects that are just outside of her comfort zone to continue to grow and expand her artistic and inventive abilities.  Oh, and did I mention she has had MS for over a decade?

A few weeks ago, Melodye posted a picture to her facebook that stopped me in my tracks.  It was one of her in a hospital bed with her two kids from sometime in the 90's.  Her photo left me reflective and grateful for dependable and consistent health that I regularly take for granted.  The photo reaffirmed my interest in including her voice in the Mom Next Door Series.  Not only because she is a Mom that continually finds the strength to parent through a debilitating illness but also because she refuses to let that be the thing that defines her as neither a Mom nor a person.

Please take a moment and enjoy your coffee while you read about my dear friend, fellow Mumma, and the fearlessly creative, Melodye O.

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Who are you?  Melodye Joy, age 54 (soon to be 55), living in rural western PA.  I blog at: www.melodyejoy.wordpress.com

Who is in your family?  Darling DannyO (married 34 years), Amanda; 32 (married to Hengyi), Brent; 28. My kiddos live away from home, in Virginia and Florida respectively. We are soon to be puppy parents of an Airedale. Sometimes one must compromise to have a good marriage and this is one of my compromises :)

2013:  Brent, Melodye, Danny, Amanda, and Hengyi

What do you do for work?  I am disabled with multiple sclerosis (since 1990) and trigeminal neuralgia (since 2008). I was working in the PR department at Crown American Corporation when I had my first MS exacerbation. While the kids were growing, I always worked one part-time job.  For 12 years I was the accompanist for the Central Cambria School District – I stopped in 2009 when the TN pain became too hard to control.

What has become (at least for now) your parenting mantra or guiding principle?  “I still own the air you breathe,” was my parenting mantra as the kids were teenagers and college-aged (because we helped with tuition and housing). I was a better parent of older children. I encouraged my kids to talk to me about anything. I’d listen, take a deep breath before responding because I didn't want them to stop telling me things. Sometimes I’d choose no response. If asked, I’d give them my best advice and remind them who was boss. I have since found out that my kids didn't tell me everything!!!

“New Morning, New Mercies,” is what I remind them now, as they go through young adult-hood. It is wonderful to know that you can start fresh each morning, no matter what happened the day before. Adulthood is hard and nothing really prepares you for working 12 months out of the year, college loans, house woes, etc.

What would your pre-mom self be surprised to know about motherhood?  That I could love another human being more than myself. I love my husband but didn't understand sacrificial love until I became a Momma.

1985:  Amanda, Melodye, and brand new baby Brent

What would your pre-mom self be proud to know about you in motherhood?  That I continued to parent even though I was dealing with, at times, a debilitating illness. I made myself available, even if I was in bed for the day. I was present in their lives. I had a great co-parent in Danny, but he worked, so the bulk of the parenting was left to me. I almost never left issues wait until “Dad gets home.” I used strength I didn't know I had just to make it through the day. I modeled how to function with adversity. I come from a line of strong women – now I’m one of them!!

1986:  sled-riding with Mom!

What kept you up at night?  I never fell asleep until all the chicks were in the nest. We had a deal: if either child felt they couldn't drive home, they had to text me to say they were staying put by 2:00 a.m. or we would pick them up, no questions asked. Honestly, they usually texted by 2 to tell me they were staying. That’s one part of being a Mom that I don’t miss!!!

2006:  Melodye, Danny, Brent, and Amanda

What big projects, worries, or events have you busy right now?  When Amanda was growing up, I made all of her formal gowns (mostly because I didn't work and we didn't have the extra money to pay hundreds of dollars for gowns). For five years or so, I went from formal to formal, thinking about the next outfit even after I was putting the finishing touches on the current one. I also made all of the Halloween costumes – some very extravagant – like the TMNT costume for Brent and the Rainbow Brite outfit for Amanda.

Now I sew for myself, make jewelry, and paint. I have a new project in the works but the first version was an epic fail so I am not going to make it known until I succeed... good art sometimes takes time.

2012:  Danny and Melodye

How (did) do you unwind or re-charge?  I am one of those people who draws energy from solitude. When I was busy with the kids’ activities, i.e. football, baseball, soccer, basketball, ballet practice, instead of spending the two hours chatting with the other Moms, I’d take my sneakers and a book. I would say hello to everyone and then either take a walk or sit and read a book. I always had a book in the glove compartment and my sneakers in the trunk of my car.

I also have a little art studio off of my bedroom. It contains my sewing machine, jewelry supplies and paints. I say, “I’m going up to create.” It is my happy place and if I’m in that room, everyone knows to leave me alone until I come out.

Editors photo edition:)  Some of Melodye's work (from upper left):  a painted table, hand-bent earrings, necklace created from client's mother & grandmother's jewelry, and mixed media piece

What do you feel like you were really good at as a mom?  Schedules!!!! I organized my house, my life, Danny’s life, Amanda’s life, Brent’s life. There wasn't much that surprised me – mostly because I had to deal with the darned MS. I would make a weekly plan, a daily plan and, in the evening, would make sure that the next day’s schedule was in place!! Both kids realized how good I was at it when they went to college and didn't have me there to schedule their lives!!!!

1987:  Amanda, Melodye, and Brent

Proof-reading. Both of my kids are great writers – mostly because books were a big part of our lives! Brent never had the latest and greatest video player; we were usually a few years behind on that. But, I took them to the library, I bought them the latest books. When Brent didn't want to read books, I bought him subscriptions to “Ranger Rick” and “SI for Kids.” We learned a lot about animals and players’ statistics! When they both started writing for school, I was the master of proof-reading. I could pick an error out, even if it was the only one on the page. During their college years, they would sometimes send me a paper to proof. (The tricky part was not re-writing the whole thing myself!)

I also modeled (even if imperfectly) for Amanda how to be a woman. I taught Brent how to treat a woman.

1984:  Little Amanda

What do you feel like you wish you were better at being a mom?  Since I've been tooting my own horn, I will confess to one thing:)   I am not a morning person. MS makes mornings even worse because my muscles spasm all night. I wake up as one big charley horse. I know that first standing position is going to be the most painful thing in my day... so... talking myself into standing up takes some time.

When Amanda was in sixth grade, I think; in the early-90’s, my MS was particularly bad. Danny left for work very early. Amanda, for one whole year, got herself up, ready for school and walked down our 1⁄4 mile lane in the dark. If I think about that too much, I weep.  I've apologized to her more than once for that failure. She is a well-adjusted young woman so I’m thinking she survived without too much injury!

1993-94:  Brent, Melodye, and Amanda

What is the one "Mom Tip or Trick" that you can share that has made your life easier somehow?  Make a schedule, even if it isn't written in stone. Even when your children are babies, make a list of one or two things you’d like to get done that day – there is wonderful satisfaction in checking off items on a list!

1986:  Baby Brent

What was the most difficult Mom moment you've had (so far)?   I won’t go into specifics because my kids are adults and I don’t want their very personal business out there. I will say that I have lain prostrate on the floor more than a few times, weeping and praying desperately for their situation; unable to change it. I have prayed over them as they slept. One cannot go through life without pain. As much as you’d like to stop their pain, you cannot. Not everything can be fixed by you. You must let them feel it, crawl out of the situation, grow from it by themselves. When you are feeling powerless, and you will - believe me you will - pray.

What are the small joys of being a Mom that you treasure most right now?  When I get a phone call, a text or a note from my precious kids. This year, one of them sent me the most precious note... the gist of it was that I believed in them when no one else did. I think that’s what brings me the most joy, knowing that, just by praying for and continuing to say, “You've got this!” I can change their self-talk. A Mom should never stop telling their kids that they can do it! Now, that’s different than letting your kids think they’re the best thing since “sliced bread.” If you don’t allow them to fail, they won’t learn how to pick themselves up!

2012:  Amanda and Brent

What do you miss most from Mom days already gone by?  If I am honest, because I am a solitary person by nature, being an empty-nester doesn't bother me. As we parented, Danny and I continued to cultivate our own relationship. We have fun together and still like each other. :)

What I miss most are Amanda’s hugs. I miss the way Brent says something in a way that just makes me laugh. I hear from both of them almost every week. We are all Facebook friends so I can “see” what they are doing. Almost every day I text them to tell them I love them and I usually include a Bible verse. Even if they are busy at work and cannot reply, I know they are drawing strength from my strength.

Amanda's Wedding 2012:  Melodye, Amanda, Danny, and Brent